To me the sole hope of human salvation lies in teaching Man to regard himself as an experiment in the realization of God, to regard his hands as God's hand, his brain as God's brain, his purpose as God's purpose. He must regard God as a helpless Longing, which longed him into existence by its desperate need for an executive organ.

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.

In your Salvation shelter I saw poverty, misery, cold and hunger. You gave them bread and treacle and dreams of heaven. I give from thirty shillings a week to twelve thousand a year. They find their own dreams; but I look after the drainage.

Better never than late.

Censorship ends in logical completeness when nobody is allowed to read any books except the books nobody reads.

The only way for a woman to provide for herself decently is for her to be good to some man that can afford to be good to her.

Ladies and gentleman are permitted to have friends in the kennel, but not in the kitchen.

The seven deadly sins... food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven millstones from Man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the millstones are lifted.

The greatest evils and the worst of crimes is poverty; our first duty, a duty to which every other consideration should be sacrificed, is not to be poor.

Better see rightly on a pound a week than squint on a million.