The worst behaved students turn out to be the most pious preachers.

Few sinners are saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon.

A minister asked a little boy how to get to the Post Office. After the little boy told him, the minister said, Why don't you come to church tonight? I'm giving instructions on how to get to heaven. After thinking a minute, the boy replied, I don't think so. You don't even know how to get to the Post Office.

Preaching is the expression of moral sentiments applied to the duties of life.

The good rain, like a bad preacher, does not know when to leave off.

It is hardly to be believed how spiritual reflections when mixed with a little physics can hold people's attention and give them a livelier idea of God than do the often ill-applied examples of his wrath.

But, good my brother, do not, as some ungracious pastors do. Show me the steep and thorny way to heaven whilst like a puffed and reckless libertine himself the primrose path of dalliance treads and wrecks not his own.

Go into the street, and give one man a lecture on morality, and another a shilling, and see which will respect you most.

The clergyman is expected to be a kind of human Sunday.

Some plague the people with too long sermons; for the faculty of listening is a tender thing, and soon becomes weary and satiated.